You just know the story will not end well..

...when it includes this sentence:

Police are retracing the route the van drove in attempt to find body parts, he said.

Down the shitter we go...

Excellent. Now I can't afford to visit my father!

The U.S. dollar's value is dropping so fast against the euro that small currency outlets in Amsterdam are turning away tourists seeking to sell their dollars for local money while on vacation in the Netherlands....

That's because the smaller currency exchanges -- despite buy/sell spreads that make it easier for them to make money by exchanging small amounts of currency -- don't want to be caught holding dollars that could be worth less by the time they can sell them.