Uh-oh

Available as a t-shirt here.

Top this!

This is so happy-making I can't stand it.



(h/t Toast)

LOL cats

OK, I check out I Can Has Cheezburger every day, because they're always worth a giggle, maybe an occasional guffaw.

But this one right here, holy shit. I literally LOLed, and clapped, and whatever else. 100% made of win.



Oh, and Sparkly Poops is totally the name of my next band.

Sing it, sister!

Kiss her on the... lips.

This rocks out loud, and is hilarious at the same time.

If nothing else, the alphabet works.

Here are 20 Songs About Cunnilingus.

And if you haven't heard song #4, that's a MUST LISTEN. Totally NSFW/kids/everything else, just for fair warning. Vulgar doesn't even come close. Awesome.

Bet ya ten bucks...

...a white guy approved the final script. Maybe after calling his "black friend."



Holla!

I first heard this during my commute to work yesterday, when I switched over to Free Beer and Hot Wings during a Mike & Mike commercial break.

I almost got into an accident I was laughing so hard.

"Do ya thing. Y’know, let it do what it do. On the real. It’s off the hook."

And while we're at it, this may be the best "worst local ad" ever!


This couch is perfect for a black person or a white person!

White Power!!

Sweet family hauler. Not-so-sweet translation.

Craig Ferguson rocks

Bwah!


And more.

Read the f&@#*ing chart!

Is that with portobellos?

More goodness here.

Hey Erica, I need a little help in the kitchen...

You know, making the sauce.

Bwahahahaha

Justin Timberlake kicked ass on SNL last night.

Here are the winning skits:

Yeah, he hit it.



I still can't believe this happened.



This is funny, but pales compared to the previous two.

It's sad to think that if SNL just had 22 interesting guests on a year, instead of just whoring for the latest idiot with a movie coming out that week, they could get a lot more of this. Instead, we get 3 or 4 great shows a year, and the rest of the time you're waiting for the Digital Short and the news, and maybe the band.

What did I miss?

While I put together my Atlanta post and some baseball stuff, here are a couple web sites I've discovered recently:

Look at This Fucking Hipster - This is great. Back in the pre-blog days I used to send out a daily collection of links, and one of my favorite things was Blue States Lose, a weekly compilation of pictures from hipster parties down in NYC. It was hilarious how bad the pictures were, and those guys wrote brilliant captions. These captions here are mostly mediocre and obvious, but the pictures are as mind-blowingly disturbing as ever.

Texts From Last Night - Unreal stuff, From gut-bustingly hilarious to kinda scary, just a record of text messages (and occasionally responses). We were discussing the site in Atlanta, and one our favorites was "Trimmed my pubes. Broke your paper shredder. Separate events." Mine personally was "My mouth tastes like bad decisions." There is just so much here. Another that stands out for me:
Text - What I really want to do is right
Reply - Start by learning how to spell

or:
(214): dude. I'm so drunk.
(972): pete, this is bryce's mom
(214): I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
(972): pete, this is still bryce's mom

or:
(808): The funny thing about my wife cheating on me is that the guy probably has genital warts now. Sweet.

or:
(703): I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.


I can read that shit all day long.

This is pretty impressive

If you've never played golf, you have no idea how difficult this is; I'm actually surprised a pro was willing to fuck with his swing for this kind of thing.

No comment required

Best. Translation. Ever.

And when I say best, I mean worst.



Wow. Apparently, Videogum had a "high school freshman with one and a half semesters of introductory French" translate it for them.

Beautiful.

You're trying awful hard, dude.

I love how he fondles the Playboy.

(h/t Videogum)

More literary, and some funny

Posnanski on Frost's The Road Not Taken. Bravo. I think about this a lot. If any one thing I did, ever, was different, would I still be here where I am today? How do I balance regret with the fact that I like where I am? I have a terribly crippling conscience, among other issues I wouldn't know how to begin to describe; there are so many things I wish I'd done differently. But if I had, I wouldn't be with Erica, with a nice house in Saratoga (a great little city), doing work I enjoy and at which I excel. I try to remember that whenever I get down on myself, but it's hard sometimes.

Do you ever think about the parallel universe you? Do you ever go back to that fork in the road - maybe you had two job offers at the same time, or two people you had to choose between relationship-wise, or any similar decision point - and wonder where the other road led?

In other news, Big Daddy Drew's latest Penthouse column is hilarious. (The ads on the page seem to be work-safe.) Ahhh, macho hang-ups... always a source of amusement to me.

Vote early, vote often!

The Name of the Year contest is down to the Final Four.

I went Nutricious Love and Velvet Milkman.

Pure genius

From the KSK folk.

A Marshawn Lynch/ee cummings mash-up.

Happy Anniversary

Harlequin Romance Novels, giving you shower-nozzle masturbation material for 60 years.



(h/t Videogum)